12 weeks. Wednesday will mark 12 weeks since my beautiful baby girl was born. There were many moments over the last two years that I thought I would never be sitting in this place, and yet here I am. As I write, I am trying to mentally prepare myself for the next transition. Now that I am barely adjusted to being a mother it's on to becoming a working mother. I can't say that I am overly excited about the prospect of going back to work, but I know it's best for our family right now. I've been largely silent the last 12 weeks as I have just been trying to take it all in and savor every moment with my baby. I am amazed how far we have both come since the moment I first held her in my arms. She's smiling now, almost sitting up on her own, holding her head up high and proud, laughing, cooing. She's no longer just this cute squishy cuddly object, but a tiny person in her own right. And me? I no longer really remember my life before her. Life without midnight feedings and diaper changes seems like a distant memory. It's amazing and hard to believe that not four months ago she was still just a dream. It truly does feel like just yesterday that I held her in my arms for the first time. Whether or not I will have the opportunity to bare witness to all her firsts, I will cherish every minute I spend with her. A wise working-mom friend of mine told me, "Well, I can promise you that you'll cherish every minute you have with her since the will be so few and far between."

And now I'm off to relish my last weekend free from other obligations. 

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What you got if you ain't got love?
The kind that you just wanna give away
It's okay to open up
Go ahead and let the light shine through

I know it's hard on a rainy day
You wanna shut the world out
And just be left alone
But don't run out on your faith

'Cause sometimes that mountain you've been climbing
Is just a grain of sand
And what you've been out there searching for forever
Is in your hands

And when you figure out
Love is all that matters after all
It sure makes everything else
Seem so small

It's so easy to get lost inside
A problem that seems so big at the time
It's like a river that's so wide
It swallows you whole

While you're sitting around thinking 'bout what you can't change
And worrying about all the wrong things
Time's flying by, moving so fast
You better make it count 'cause you can't get it back

Sometimes that mountain you've been climbing
Is just a grain of sand
And what you've been out there searching for forever
Is in your hands

Oh, and when you figure out
Love is all that matters after all
It sure makes everything else
Seem so small!

Sometimes that mountain you've been climbing
Is just a grain of sand
And what you've been out there searching for forever
Is in your hands

And then you figure out
Love is all that matters after all
It sure makes everything else
Oh, it sure makes everything else
Seem so small

"So Small" Carrie Underwood

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